The Magnificent Seven: exceeded expectations

Last week, no particular movie caught my eye. I got conservative with my money and decided to save the $1 dollars for the ticket, and also went to hang out with my brother and his wife. Morgan originally caught my eye, but I'm not fond of the actress in the preview (the one who played the invisible woman in the new, atrocious Fantastic Four movie). She makes me not want to watch stuff she's in for some irrational reason.

The poster for The Magnificent Seven is like the opposite of that actor's face:

It was Chris Pratt's face that did it

This is not quite the image I mean. When I went to see Kubo and the Two Strings at Times Square movie theater, there was a cardboard, 3D poster that almost looked tough enough to take a few people's weight a server as a bench. It had an outline of the Old West town around it. I was about to use it as a bench myself, then noticed a much cheaper cardboard sign at it's base that said something like Warning: Not a bench; will not take your weight. Since the palate of the film is so brown, that cardboard sign almost looked like a part of the proper poster. I laughed because I'd almost made a fool out of myself. Somehow, that cemented the movie in my head. 

I'm glad for the incident because this movie deserves blockbuster status. I know it's a remake, and of a movie that was already a remake, so I don't pretend this is the trend-bucking, non-sequel, original content we all pretend we want from Hollywood, but it sort of is for me personally. I've never been a big fan of Westerns, possibly because I was not born/two young/or out of the country when it was in its hey-day.

The plot of the film is what I assume is standard for such stories: there is a small town out in the Old West that's under siege by a self-described capitalist who wants to kick out all the righteous settlers (who probably killed all the Natives around) for a measly twenty bucks per acre of land. And he'll kill them if they don't comply. The opening scene has him beating up a priest, burning a church, and killing the lone female lead's husband in cold blood for daring to stand up to him. 

There's not much to say about the villain, other than the fact that he acted a little. . . feminine? He almost minced his steps, wore pressed, pristine clothes that seemed immune to all the dust and grime around, and tried to kill Denzel Washington with a tiny gun he hid in his boot. I'm not saying this movie is outright homophobic (the villain is not even explicitly gay, or in a close relationship with any other character, male or female), just that it's interesting that its villain is painted in a feminine light when all seven heroes are some variation of a man's man.

Speaking of the heroes, there's not really much to say of them either. Denzel Washington plays a cowboy well, I think, even though I never quite forgot that he's Denzel Washington. I suppose he can't help being that famous. Chris Pratt was basically reprising Star Lord, but I liked Star Lord, so whatever. My sole complaint is that I wish Pratt had gotten less screen time. I don't dislike him, or the even the character, but I've feel like I've seen some variation of this guy a million times over. Ethan Hawke's character, or Billy Rocks (played by Byung Hun Lee) should have been introduced first. Hell, the guy played by Vincent D'Onofrio was more interesting. The Mexican guy's whose name I forget was more interesting. Red Harvest was more interesting. Literally any of the other guys.

But I get it. Chris Pratt is more famous than all of them, so he gets more screen time. It wasn't enough to keep me from enjoying the movie, but it certainly keeps the film from hitting a near-perfect pitch.